No Reservations – DC and an Ode to Maryland

I really can’t wait to see the DC episode of No Reservations.  I’d live blog it but I’m usually asleep when it airs.  Wanna watch it with me?  The episode airs Monday night, 10 PM Eastern on the Travel Channel.  I’ll be watching it on my trusty DVR Tuesday night.

On the Venice show Tony eats a tomato salad prepared with tomatoes picked 10 minutes before he eats it.  Oh baby.  Oh.  Oh Baby.  I’ve been working my way through the spring garden/plant catalogs trying to figure out which heirloom tomatoes I want to plant this year.  I’m torn.  I just don’t know what I want this year.  Argh.

Oh, back to No Reservations DC.  Please watch it.  I love my hometown, hot air politicians and all.  I hope I’m not disappointed, and I don’t think I will be.  Most travel shows that highlight DC spend all their time on the Mall and in the Smithsonian.  Don’t get me wrong, I love them too, but there is so much more to DC than the Federal Government and it’s tax-payer supported free stuff.  (TOTALLY not complaining about the free museums.  Really.)  It’s just a shame that Poseurs in Georgetown is gone.  And DC Space.  And the Nightclub 930 moved to a place that no longer, um, smells.  Anyone remember the smell?  I’m excited that Tony came to DC because he of all travel hosts doesn’t waste time looking at the stuff everyone else has already looked at a bazillion times.

Now, if only I can convince Tony to come to Maryland.  Maybe I’ll have to tell the story of the Goatman and Crybaby Bridge.*  And Glendale Hospital and the mad doctor who created the Goatman.

Oh, and by the way, if you come to Maryland and want to cook blue crabs by yourself, please, for the love of all that’s holy, don’t boil them.  Just don’t.  That’s evil, a sin against God and man.  You STEAM them.  And you must, absolutely and without question, use Old Bay.  If you don’t then the Goatman will hunt you down and toss your lifeless body beneath Crybaby Bridge to walk the earth moaning at midnight on the Patuxent looking for the baby that cries for it’s mother.

Then he would need to go to Ocean City.  Oh, Ocean City, happy place.  Boardwalk Fries, pass the vinegar, no ketchup!  Ketchup is for philistines!!!  Vinegar and salt only.  Fries best eaten on the beach with sand crammed in your whohaa and the most gentle of ocean breezes blowing sand in your mouth.  You don’t need napkins, you just jump in the ocean and rinse off.

Another ode to Maryland and Ocean City – If you are ever here for longer than 48 hours, I completely recommend traveling to OC for sunrise, no matter the season.  Even in the dead of winter, watching the sun rise over the Atlantic is a thing of gorgeous beauty.

*On the Crybaby Bridge Wikipedia entry there’s comments about how the legends of Crybaby Bridge first cropped up on the internet in 1999.  Dude.  I grew up hearing these legends, long before Algore invented the internet.  The guy who makes these claims evidently never spoke to anyone who actually grew up in PG County.  If you attended any Senior High in the county you couldn’t get through a Friday or Saturday night without at least once a semester driving over one of the Crybaby Bridges and listening for the crying baby.  Or looking for the bodies dumped by the crime sydicates in DC.  Especially on Lottsford Vista Road.  Ooooooooo.

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2 Responses to No Reservations – DC and an Ode to Maryland

  1. Emmy says:

    I watched the show. I looked for you there but didn’t see you- Where were you????

    I have only been to DC once and did not get to eat any yummy food- we ate out of coolers. But a lot of what I saw looked really good. I want to know if the stuff at that bar was as good as it looked, because some of that looked really good- expensive, but good.

    Also loved the crab eating and the story on the food kitchen guy. I liked that Tony went to a lot of places that were local.

    send a care package…………….

  2. vivianlouise says:

    Will do Emmy. Will do.

    http://no-reservations-crew-blog.travelchannel.com/read/a-self-evident-truth

    I started laughing as I read the crew blog. They were in DC, obviously, during the summer. Hahahaha! Any research about DC would have revealed that the town cleared out in the summer. The combination of the heat, the swamp and the heat made it unbearable.* Literally. It wasn’t until the advent of air conditioning that that city got any Federal work done in the summer months. It’s a sweltering hell hole in the summer.

    The hell hole I love.

    *redundancy intended.

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